Ah, April – almost time to visit other gardeners’ dreams come to life! Gardeners tend to understand each other and their host’s unspoken considerations when visiting gardens – however if any reminders or updates are needed please reach out – but hopefully not many!
Yellow trout lily (Erythronium americanum), Virginia blue bells and the foliage of Trillium recurvatum form an appealing combination.
Allow me to digress
Remember when you were younger and ready to attend an exciting social event like a birthday party or dinner at a friend’s house? Your mom probably said something along these lines as you left: Remember your manners Young Lady/Man and Be on Your Best Behavior”. If no one ever said this to you personally then that is yet another story and too late in life to discuss any further here.
Do not disrupt what others are doing. Ask permission before taking photos of plants, gardens, or gardeners that might appear on social media. Not everyone may wish for their images to appear online.
Bellwort (Uvularia perfoliata), Paeonia obovata and Phlox divaricata are three perennial herbs commonly seen around the garden.
Dress Appropriately
A woman wearing high heels while touring my garden quickly turned into groundcover around Arisaema. Her graceful movement ranged from performing the Twist dance in the 60s, to landing gracefully from a path onto my garden bed; all while crushing Whiplash Lilies plants that had grown there. Unfortunately, however, green stains on her white blouse didn’t match well with her red cheeks!
Arisaema Urishima No, my garden and cottage do not close for winter to spend in Florida or Arizona – this is my home! Unfortunately there is only one bathroom available within my greenhouse greenhouse – use either your bus to bring you or wait your turn until your turn comes up – remember this is my garden not a park system!
Stay on the Garden Path
Although an easy task, straying off course from an obvious route may be tempting. One step into an eye-catching bed to take a closer look can easily tempt visitors off track; after spending days tilling and amending soil and weeks constructing paths on their property, your host likely does not appreciate another gardener compacting their efforts further by walking on beds they prepared – especially since I wouldn’t wish on anyone who did so while visiting! To see another visiting gardener leave their path and walk across someone’s beds is enough to cause me pause before biting my pencil!
Do not point out weeds
Your host is more than likely aware of every weed in their garden, particularly garlic mustard due to native plant nuts leaving the path and running into beds to pull plants; proudly they will walk back through holding out the offending weed like proud children with dandelions in hand; while walking across other plants not yet up yet they got it for you – stay on the path (unless invited for a weed pulling party ) (also see above.).
No snitching the garden goodies
Without asking permission beforehand, taking anything from the garden without permission is strictly forbidden! Even taking just a pinch, small start, or seeds might seem innocuous given all the other flowers growing there; but, no doubt they would be missed; although taking from another garden might seem okay at first. When tour groups finished touring my garden I took a walk alone before relaxing – after seeing an Anemonella that once stood there now reside in its place. My hope is that when they reach hell then at least they’ll remember its beauty fondly when remembered fondly by hell’s inhabitants!
Arisaema candidissimum
One last piece of advice Saying thanks is always appreciated; be it through note cards, emails or just saying it at the end of a garden visit – even something as small as saying thank you can make someone’s day! That garden may have taken years of work from its creator to create just for your visit and give hours of entertainment during your stay – gardeners love sharing but appreciate hearing when someone tells them “you did an excellent job”.
My world, created over three-plus decades, is unraveling before my very eyes. What once felt like control – my garden – no longer exists due to diminishing strength and resolve; after four or five years of grieving I have finally come full circle; all that remains now is my spirit and soul waiting in its cocoon until its transformation can happen.
Yew Dell Botanical Gardens will make another trip or two to harvest all the plants they desire from my dream garden, giving my children a place they can flourish surrounded by plant enthusiasts who will appreciate and admire them more than any person could ever do in another lifetime.
